The Art Of Marriage

This was actor Paul Newman’s letter to his wife on their wedding day, talking about the art of marriage

Happiness in marriage is not something that just happens.

A good marriage must be created.

In the Art of Marriage, the little things are the big things.

It is never being too old to hold hands. It is remembering to say ‘I love you’ at least once a day.

It is never going to sleep angry. It is at no time taking the other for granted; the courtship should not end with the honeymoon; it should continue through all the years.

It is having a mutual sense of values and common objectives. It is standing together facing the world.

It is forming a circle of love that gathers the whole family. It is doing things for each other, not in the attitude of duty or sacrifice, but in the spirit of joy.

It is speaking words of appreciation and demonstrating gratitude in thoughtful ways. It is not expecting the husband to wear a halo or the wife to wings of an angel.

It is not looking for perfection in each other. It is cultivating flexibility, patience, understanding, and a sense of humor.

It is having the capacity to forgive and forget. It is giving each other an atmosphere in which each can grow.

It is finding rooms for things of the spirit. It is a common search for the good and the beautiful.

It is establishing a relationship in which independence is equal, dependence is mutual, and obligation is reciprocal.

It is not only marrying the right partner, it is being the right partner.

Mums, have you got any marriage advice that has helped you to keep your marriage strong?

Comment below to let us know x

97 thoughts on “The Art Of Marriage

    • Fathima says:

      Marriage is a work in progress. Reaching each milestone is an achievement, whether it’s 1 year, 5 years, or 25 years. This article provides sound advice.

  1. Cyndi says:

    I love all these tips except the one about don’t go to bed angry. The more tired I get the more mean I am so it is better for me to kiss my husband and tell him that I love him but right now I don’t like him and go to bed. In the morning things are usually okay and we can work through it.
    I also believe that every greeting includes an “I love you” and since Covid and losing my father I have extended this to my family. I work from home and hubby is retired – we still greet each other which a kiss like we would if I was going to work. Married for 25 years now and my goal is to get to 60 like my parents did.

    • Julie says:

      Marriage is a job, it takes hard work to manage it. Communication is key, making time for yourselves is important, just a night away is great, we try to do that at least once a month

  2. Sumaya says:

    The Key is communication and communication even for the smallest thing, sometimes we think it’s not important but for your spouse communication and being in the knowing of what’s happening its what counts. Also placing God in the Centre knowing somethings you just have to prayer and leave it to God to intervern. Even if you not prayering together you prayer requests should be the same.

  3. Jolene says:

    Wow! So beautiful 🙂

    Marriage takes work to work. Never stop doing the small things together. Communication and respect is key. Remember you are a team, you are one. Never let outside interference hinder your marriage. Prayers works. Go to God with all your problems. He is always there to listen and to guide you. Marriage counseling helps. Talk to someone you trust together to get some help together. And lastly, just enjoy each other. Keep doing things you did in the first place.

    • lillianpeta88 says:

      Marriage is beautiful thing it takes both parties to put the work to make it work learn to forgive don’t go to bed angry with each other talk about it out even it doesn’t get resolved that day but talk about it. go on date nights do fun thing’s together make time just the 2 of you without kid’s. Put God first pray together. And communicate if someone does something you don’t like don’t assume they know tell them .

  4. chanwill4u says:

    In recent times people dont marry for love.they marry for status and what they can get from the partner. I have been married for many years now and each and everday i will choose my husband and kids not money or status.so can we go back yo that values that we were taught by our parents/ grandparents and most importantly God

  5. Cindy-Lee says:

    On our wedding day, we got alot of advice from our guest’s but, one stood out the most for us. A cousin of my husband said “In marriage they say it’s 50 50 but, it should be that each one gives 100% of themselves. So give each other 100% of yourself and your marriage will grow stronger”. I think people today are very quick to give up on marriage and that is where alot of misunderstanding and lack of many things come from. I agree 100% with this article, as it speaks volumes.

      • nyembesma says:

        Marriage oh lord such a beautiful union, I’m a sucker for love and I enjoy bring married. Not a perfect phase but definitely beautiful and blessed to be one of the women to be married and of course putting God first all the time as our leader and guardian. Marriage is a sense of mutual feelings

    • onanaonana says:

      I believe marriage is Love, communication, Respect and compromising!
      Know your partner and being open enough to one another and yet allowing each individual to grow is what builds a strong union. Appreciate the little things and eventually they will be great!

  6. jemjay24 says:

    Marriage isnt the union of perfect people but its the union of people willing to come together to make something of their union. Marriage is beautiful but you also have to put work in. This article perfectly sums up what marriage is. Beautuful piece Mumbox thank you. Your magazine articles are empowering honestly, thank you once again.

  7. ncubesiphalegal says:

    Many at times we have expectations about our future partners: their personality, characters and how we should treat us… and forget that we must also be good partners. The most outstanding attribute to marriage for me is communication. That is very important. Thank you Mumbox.

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