11 steps to follow when raising kids

Ann Landers was a pen name created by Chicago Sun-Times advice columnist Ruth Crowley in 1943. For 56 years, the Ask Ann Landers syndicated advice column was a regular feature in many newspapers across North America.

The creator of the “Ann Landers” pseudonym was Ruth Crowley, a Chicago nurse who had been writing a child-care column for the Sun since 1941. (*wikipedia)

Below is an expert from one of her columns, the steps to follow when raising kids.

1. Remember that a child is a gift from God, the richest of all blessings. Do not attempt to mold them in the image of yourself. Each child is an individual and should be permitted to be themselves.
2. Don’t crush a child’s spirit when they fail, and never compare them with others who have outshined them.
3. Remember that anger and hostility are natural emotions. Help your child to find socially acceptable outlets for these normal feelings or they may be turned inward and erupt.
4. Discipline your child with firmness and reason. Don’t let your anger throw you off balance. If they know you are fair, you will not lose their respect or their love. And make sure the punishment fits the crime. Even the youngest child has a keen sense of justice.
5. Remember to present a united front with your partner. Never join with your child against your partner. This can create in your child (as well as yourself) emotional conflicts. It can also create feelings of guilt and insecurity.
6. Do not hand your child everything their little heart desires. Permit them to know the thrill of earning and the joy of achieving.
7. Do not set yourself up as the epitome of perfection. This is a difficult role to play 24hours a day. You will find it easier to communicate with your child if you let them know their parents can err, too.
8. Don’t make threats in anger or impossible promises when you are in a generous mood. Threaten or promise only that which you can live up to. To a child, a parent’s word means everything. The child who has lost faith in his parents has difficulty believing in anything.
9. Do not smother your child with superficial manifestations of ‘love’. The healthiest love expresses itself day-in, day-out, which breeds self-confidence and independence.
10. Teach your child there is dignity in hard work, no matter what their profession. Let them know a useful life is a blessed one and a life of ease and pleasure-seeking is empty.
11. Do not try to protect your child against every small blow and disappointment. Adversity strengthens character and makes us compassionate. Trouble is the great equalizer.

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Mums do you agree with these steps above? Are there any other steps you teach your kids that you can share with us?

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