Free Me!

Every mom knows how important some ‘me time’ can be – but actually making it happen is often another story… after we’ve poured all we have into all those around us, we’re all too often fresh out of time, money, and energy to even begin to think about our own needs.

And yet taking care of ourselves is a round-about way of taking care of everyone else we care about. As the saying goes, you can’t pour from an empty cup.

So without further ado, here are 5 (free) me-time ideas you really can fit into your day (yes, even you)!

1. RECLAIM SOME DAILY SOLITUDE

The incessant demands of modern-day motherhood can leave us feeling seriously depleted and strangely lonely, and yet what we need more than anything is more alone time! Whether you’re an introvert or an extrovert, we all benefit from some quiet moments to ourselves to reflect and process the rest of our lives. Optional extras include music, a good book, and a comforting drink.

2. DIARISE A REGULAR CHECK-IN WITH THE CEO

It’s you – you are the CEO of you! And it’s really crucial you make a point of regularly prioritising an all-important meeting with yourself. Consider it as essential as you would any other work-related meeting. At this meeting, make sure that every ‘one’ is present… mind, body, heart, and soul. Check-in with each one. Start with body: welcome her to the meeting… whilst she works so hard to keep you going, you may have neglected, ignored, or despised her. If so, take a moment to remember how amazing she really is – flaws and all.

Ask yourself, how are you really doing, physically?

Consider how you could take better care of her (just as you would your own child). Consider how you could be kinder and more gracious with her. Take a minute to listen to every part… is there any underlying pain or anxiety in your body you need to acknowledge and address? Take a moment to consciously relax your body and every muscle – starting from your face muscles, right down to your toes. Next on the agenda, let the mind take the floor: How are you doing, mentally?

Just allowing ourselves the space to articulate our worries, fears, and thoughts can really help us to gain clarity and a sense of calm. After you’ve given your mind a few moments to hold the room, write down anything that feels like an unresolved burden, as well as any insights that might have come to mind. After you’ve done this, be sure to question any dead-end thinking and hopeless thoughts.

Rather, think again… remember: not everything you think is true! And that leads us to the third member of the meeting: heart. She represents the seat of all your emotions and feelings. So how are you feeling emotionally? Give yourself the space to feel all the feels. No emotions are ‘bad’ – each one needs to feel acknowledged in order to properly be resolved. Ask yourself what has led to the feelings you now have – what are some of the root causes. Is there anything you have direct control over? Finally, get in touch with your soul, sister… This is the spiritual part of you. Most (if not all) religions see this part as paramount to the rest.

Without a flourishing soul, we walk into every other aspect of our lives with a limp. So what can you do to truly refresh your soul? Whatever you decide – make a decision to put your plans into practical bite-sized action steps. Meeting dismissed!

3. ADD SOME GOLD TO THE DAILY GRIND

Sitting in traffic, cleaning the house, lifting the kids, making dinner, shopping, helping with homework… we often have to do things that really don’t energise us. But what about taking some of the most mundane parts of your day and giving them a sneaky me-time makeover? Start by listing the things that you have to do regularly, that you really don’t like to do.

Now look over that list, and brainstorm how you could possibly add something that you love to do, or never have time to do, to those same daily grind activities…

Here are a few ideas:

– Use the time you spend traveling every day to do also listen to a book or a podcast, or your favourite music – whatever floats your boat.
– While taking care of household chores, why not also watch a series or dance to your favourite music?
– While waiting for kids between school activities, take a book or a magazine along, or use the time to repaint your nails or catch a quick power nap!
– Do you exercise regularly? Why not do that with a good friend and kill two birds with one stone (friend time and exercise).
– You have to wash your body, but don’t just rush through your self-care routine; make it a mini-me-time moment… think bubble bath, candles, music, and chocolate, or a face mask and indulgent shower body scrub every now and then.

4. BREATHE, DEEP

Taking ten proper deep and slow breathes a day is the fastest and most effective way to reclaim some peace and inner calm. And because us women are such bad-ass multi-taskers, you could consider adding this to another daily activity and doing both at the same time… perhaps your last five minutes of travel before getting to work or picking up the kids.

5. JUST SAY ‘NO’!

Often, as moms, we take on more tasks, responsibilities, and burdens than we should. This can leave us feeling extra-drained, and no me-time is going to make that any better. The remedy: getting better at separating our worth from our works, and getting comfortable disappointing others if it means not dangerously depleting ourselves. Is there something in the back of your mind that you’ve said ‘yes’ to but that you really shouldn’t have?

Well, just say no. Say it loud, say it unapologetically, say it proud! Then do it again, and again – and as you do, feel the weight of a thousand smaller, unseen obligations fall off your shoulders. Challenge yourself to say ‘no’ to any invitations and obligations that you don’t immediately want to shout a big ‘YES’ to.

As crazy as this sounds, the outcome will leave you feeling less stressed, overstretched, and resentful – and that’s something that not even a full Spa Day can do!

As seemingly small as these five things are – try them out to see what a significant difference they can make.

Then let us know how it’s going, or if you have any other amazing me-time ideas comment below x